When Iterative Development Goes Wrong: A Satirical Tale of Vague Requirements

Pilot Fish (the protagonist) receives a software project to handle various service requests for the company’s customer service center, including scheduling, equipment tracking, engineer requests, and design issues.

He diligently meets with department heads, trying to record their needs, but each response is the same: “I don’t know, just do something roughly and we’ll see later.”

Undeterred, he seeks opinions from potential users in each department, only to hear the identical reply: “Do something roughly, then we’ll give suggestions.”

Frustrated by the lack of concrete requirements, he decides to invite all department heads to a project demonstration, even the company president, whose sudden appearance nearly scares him.

In the meeting room filled with people, Pilot Fish starts the demo. The large screen shows the project title, then the computer’s CD‑ROM automatically opens, pauses for a few seconds, and closes again.

After the demo, a department head asks if the equipment is broken. Pilot Fish offers to replay the demo; he double‑clicks the project icon, the title reappears, and the CD‑ROM opens and closes once more.

The vice‑president of the mechanical engineering department remarks that the functionality is merely opening the CD‑ROM. Pilot Fish smiles and says, “Exactly, then we close it.”

The vice‑president of the electronics department and other heads express dissatisfaction, saying, “This isn’t what we wanted!”

Pilot Fish loudly declares, “No one told me what you wanted, so I built something based on my own idea. Do you want to see it again?”

The room falls silent with tension until the senior executive at the back falls out of his chair, breaking the silence. Pilot Fish later recounts that he thought the executive had a heart attack from anger, but the executive burst out laughing.

Before leaving work that day, Pilot Fish receives the departments’ written requirements, but in the following months they ignore him.